barush: (15 feet)
This is gonna be real short, 'cause I just need to get it out of my system.

Remember the history written final I've been whining about recently? We got it back and to my huge surprise I got 1! =) It was really close though, I had 51 points out of 60 and 49 was already 2. But the over all marks weren't that good. The most points anyone got was 53 and there were just 4 people who had 1 (out of 16). Honestly, I think the teacher (our class teacher, no less) could have been less strict. Oh well. I guess I can be glad they, for some unexplainable reason, liked my Nazi essay =) And for the oral part I can get maximum 40 points, so altogether the max is 100 and 80 is still 1, 60 still 2... So that means I must get at least 9 points out of 40 to have 2, which would be totally okay with me =) Spanish, on the other hand, will be much worse.

Now to the not so happy news. You might also remember me stressing over the uni applications. Today I got all the invitations for my uni entrance exams and guess what? They're all in one day!!! =/ Prague, Brno and Olomouc, meh. In Brno I have Spanish and English in one day, so they'll move one of them to the next day, but it still means the rest is on the 1st June. So I guess I'm decided I'll sit the exams in Olomouc on the 1st (English and Spanish) and either English or Spanish in Brno on the 2nd, depending on what they'll move. SO this basically means I'll fucking stay here for uni, which really, really sucks. Well, depending if I'll be accepted here. If not, then I'm screwed 'cause I doubt I'll get to Brno. My last hope would be the school in Prague for which I've already sat the exams.

So, I'm pissed beyond belief. Also, I'm sorry if you made it here. I just needed to whine.

barush: (insomnia)
I'm not dead yet.

I sat the history final on Wednesday and it was much more difficult than I'd expected. Or at least the multiple choice part. I mean, questions like "What was the religion in the Mogul empire in India?" or "Who moved the Pope from Avignon back to Rome?" or "How many days lasted the Berlin Airlift?" just weren't cool. It felt like a guessing game. I know about at least 6 mistakes so far (there were 40 multiple questions) and there's surely more. Then, for the source work, I chose the documents about Cuban missile crisis. It was either that or the Munich agreement from 1938, but that was too related to the Czech Republic that I felt I should know more about it lol The essay topics were terrible as usually so I wrote 'The Treaty of Versailles was the principle cause of Hitler's rise to power' and I basically made Hitler a nice, caring man lmao I mean, they could use the essay for Nazi propaganda right away *facepalm* Oh well.

And today I sat my first university entrance exam. In Prague at 8.30am so we went there yesterday with my mother. It wasn't as difficult as I'd expected this time. It was an English text (about Jihad) and we had to translate it to Czech with the use of a dictionary. However, I wouldn't want to go to this school so I don't particularly care if I'm accepted or not.

Now I'm gonna catch up on House fics lol
barush: (insomnia)
History whining again! Beware!  )
barush: (hugh)
Well, the long-anticipated House epi was rather anti-climatic, hm. For me at least. That happens when you expect too much I guess.

Also, I'm not dead. Just didn't feel like whining in here, although I'd have a lot to whine about. But to try to justify my lack of updating, I'm trying to study for my written final exam from history, which is on the 15th April, and therefore I'm aiming to cut down on my online time. Those who have me added on msn probably know how well it's working *facepalm* I'm currently somewhere in the 1850s so there's a long way to go to the 2000s, including two world wars and so much other shit. I'd better stop now and go studyyy, meh.

Also, I got my period after just 14 days today and generally feel like shit. I hate doctors, so I hope nothing else happens *sigh*

barush: (loverman)
So tomorrow I have the oral part of the CAE exams. I've no idea how I did on the written one but I don't feel that good about it, so I don't really wanna fuck up the oral one now. I've read some of the 'useful phrases' such as 'I think it's essential to...' or 'I've never given it much thought but...', but I highly doubt I'll use any of them lol Now I just hope I won't be paired up with anyone too good =)

Also, remember me whining about the mock final exam from history? We got it back today and I have 2 (1 is the best, 5 the worst), which really surprised me. There was only one 1 and my score was the second best actually. It wasn't spectacular or anything (especially the essay, meh), but if I did like that on the real exam I'd be okay with it. Of course, there's still the oral part of the exam, but the written one makes like 60% of the final mark.

Oh well, other than that nothing too interesting has happened, I guess. Or it did, but I don't feel like rambling now, so maybe tomorrow =) 

barush: (suicide)
I'm writing a math test tomorrow and don't know anything *sigh* However, I've been slaving over WWII notes today and studied law so at least I can rationalize why I didn't study to maths.

Other than that I'm kinda sad for no apparent reason. Not depressed or anything, just sad. Some people are ignoring me and I've no idea why, school sucks (as usually)  and I'm starting to stress about the finals. I'm writing a final exam from history in less than a month and I haven't started to study properly yet.

On the other hand, I've found some new songs to listen to and a few pretty good House fics to read so at least something. Yeah, I don't really need much in life.

I guess I should go to bed, it's kinda late already. Night everyone.

barush: (Suns sweat)
So the yesterday's mock finals from history were a total disaster. There were 40 multiple questions (a to e) and I had to guess most of them as I had no clue. The 'source work' was more or less okay, about USA and USSR relationship during 1940s, but the essay... meh. The topics were so terrible that I had to choose smt along the lines of  'USA are justified to use force to restore peace all over the world. Do you agree?'.  I had no clue what I was writing, just made some shit it up, but I vaguely remember I didn't agree probably. And the best part is that most of my classmates were like 'Oh that was so easy!' lol Whatever.

Today morning I sat another exams, but those were smt like uni entrance exams. Only, not really. I'm not gonna explain the whole difficult process of that but I think those could be compared the SATs maybe. Or at least the principle. However, the schools I sent my applications to don't require those tests, they have their own, so I don't actually need them for anything. But since I signed up in December already and payed for them I went there anyways. Also, it'd be interesting to see the results, how stupid I am in comparison with my peers lol 

Now i should probably make some notes to Spanish or history but I'm too lazy to do that so I'm gonna write or read = )

barush: (Default)
So what did I do during the weekend? Right, nothing. Again. Okay, so I did do a few homeworks and made some notes but I didn't study history at all, the only chance I had to really look at it. I can't believe myself. 

Anyways. I've almost 2 pages of the Che!fic already, the process of writing it is very slow but I haven't abandoned it yet, go me. Also, I'm thinking about entering a writing contest, the requirements are to write a story of max. 1500 words and the prompt is 'change'. I already have some vague idea but if anyone has some stroke of genius and wants to share - go for it =)

On another note, I'm planning to go to Berlin in summer with my friend so if there's anyone from Berlin or anyone's planning to go there, let me know =) I'd love to meet some LJ friends in rl =)

I guess I'll go to bed now, school tomorrow *sadface*


Feb. 27th, 2009 10:01 pm
barush: (insomnia)
I love my best friend. Really, love her, 'cause this must be the first time she did something just for me and not because she had some benefit from it too. I mean, it's just a book, but still, that's something so rare coming from her. To enlighten you, my friend went to Prague today to see a musical and I asked her if she wasn't going to this huge bookshop 'cause I'd need a Spanish book from there. And, even though it's on the opposite part of the city and she didn't need anything there she got me the book that I had desperately wanted for months. Now you're probably thinking 'wtf she's talking about?' 'cause that's something completely normal, right? But my best friend, as much as I love her, isn't the one to go out of her way for others. So now I'm super excited 'cause I'll have the book when we meet and to the top of that I know now she's probably not such a hopeless case =)

Also, today I've found out I'm completely screwed history -wise. In today's seminar the teacher showed us a few years old written history final exam (the one I'm taking in April) and I knew like... almost nothing. There are 40 multiple choice questions, then working with sources and an essay. We had one copy for a pair and together with my classmate we got 20 out of the 40 questions right, but at least 10 of the 20 were just a fluke... So go figure. I haven't started to study yet so now I know what my weekend will be dedicated to *sigh* Next Friday we're writing a 'mock final exam' from history, which will be basically the same thing as we did today, but taken in controlled conditions and marked afterwards, so we know what April will be like. So, anyone know how to study world's history from Ancient Greece and Rome up to this year in one week? No? Me neither. Good times.

Also, I've started the Che fic. And it'll be terrible, I can tell, but at least I'll get it out of my system.

barush: (Default)
I should really, really, really study law and philosophy now, but I'm so tired I can hardly keep my eyes open. I hate the teacher for giving us a test and examining in the same day from two completely different things, grrr. Doesn't help there are like 30 pages of law at least, which I haven't even looked at yet. For some reason, philosophy is easier for me to study/remember so I'm gonna start with that.

On another note, I just got back from the hairdresser. He was as cute as ever=) And my hair is kinda short again and a bit... purple I guess. Well, something between red and purple anyways.

Oh and my Che Guevara fic is now planned, almost, so I just need to get around to actually writing it. And omg I can't wait for today's (tomorrow's for me, I'm downloading it) House =) Nipple twister ftw lol

Other than that, I've sent my last uni application today so that's over and done with and now I'm just praying I'll actually get somewhere *sigh* The entrance exams are usually in May and June so I've a while yet to start freaking out.

'Kay, that's it I guess, Marcus Aurelius and others are calling. Can hear them, really.


Feb. 17th, 2009 08:12 pm
barush: (Default)
I had to leave school early today (at 10am so after just 2 hours) 'cause I was really sick =/ It was right before a math test though, so I imagine how it must have looked like *sigh* Oh well. I came home and slept for like 6 hours. And I'm still pretty sick. It's probably the flu or some such as I have a fever too, as if the nausea wasn't enough. I haven't thrown up yet, surprisingly, but it feels like it's gonna happen any minute. I'm not gonna go to school tomorrow probably, which sucks, but I can't do anything about it.

'Kay, can't stay here too long, the screen's making me positively boil. Just needed to whine a bit. Take care, all of you.

barush: (15 feet)
Yes, I'm still alive. Surprised? I've been around, just didn't feel like updating LJ. Dunno why, I'd have a lot to whine about actually.

Anyways, I've sent most of the university applications, 5 to be precise, and I'll think about sending more. I've till the end of February to do that. Basically I've stuck to my initial ideas and applied for English, Spanish and special pedagogy, divided among 3 cities (Olomouc, Brno and Prague, if it tells you anything). However, I've only one for Prague so I'll think about something more. And I'm starting to have this feeling that I won't get anywhere, which is entirely possible. Oh well.

Other than that, I've finished the seminar work of doom for history. It took me like 3 days only, so that was surprising. I guess that with the level of apprehension I feel the time spent on the actual task lowers exponentially. I was writing about my grandmother's life before, during and after the World War Two, but I've probably mentioned that here already, ages ago.

Oh and we've had holidays this week, which I've spent writing the seminar work and reading House fics. Tells a lot about my life, eh? But I've been to cinema at least to see the new movie about Che Guevara and I loved it <33 If you're a history freak, like Cuba or are just interested in El Che, it's a must see.

Now I've a craving to write. Maybe even House, hm. Well, I'll see.

barush: (dark genius nick)
You know what I hate? Stuff I need to do for school that requires some internet research. Because, you know, the internet is full of fan fiction that causes unwanted distraction. I have no will power to fight it so I just give in and start to look for fics I haven't read yet instead of searching for Spanish history in Spanish. I am fucking hopeless *facepalm*

Other than that... My grandfather's funeral is on the upcoming Friday. So instead of going skiing, I'm going to mourn with a few dozens of people I don't know, but they all know me. And you know what? I am fucking looking forward to it. Really. My mother told me they were gonna play 'Requiem' by Mozart there and I was like 'awesome!'. Never mind my grandfather died. Never mind my mother's depressed and doped up on antidepressants. I'm really wondering what kind of a creature I've turned into. I cried only once, for a while, and now... I'm not even sad. I don't... care. And frankly, it kind of scares me. I don't get myself anymore.

I will kneel at your feet
I will lie at your door
I will rock you to sleep
I will roll on the floor
And I'll ask for nothing
Nothing in this life
I'll ask for nothing
Give me ever-lasting life

There she goes, my beautiful world
There she goes, my beautiful world
There she goes, my beautiful world
There she goes again

barush: (dark genius nick)
OMFG start writing the fucking essay!! *slaps herself*  I'm such a pathetic loser that it's not even funny anymore.

Other than that, my hands are freezing. But the rest of my body is kinda warm so that's just weird.

Also, I don't wanna fucking grow old. Never. Ever. No I'm not hoping to live forever, God forbid, I just don't wanna be old. I'll probably off myself when the first important organ/part of my body gives out, and that wouldn't have to take too long either. Because if I ever end up like my grandfather it will be much worse than dying young.

Now, I said it. And surely I'll be run over by a bus when I step outside the next. Because, you all know what happened to John Lennon, right? And he always said that growing old was the thing he feared the most in life.

Anyways, I need to sign up for the
CAE    exam till the 16th of this month and pay a shitload of money to that date too. Why, or why, is this exams so fucking expensive?! I'll laugh my ass off if I fail it or get a C (a B would be okay but an A is an A, you know?). The exam itself will be on March 14th so I've plenty of time to get worked up over it.

My hands are a bit warmer now, typing helps. Maybe I should start typing up the essay, just to warm my hands. I need little unimportant goals, because the word 'important' triggers something in my brain that immediately starts telling me 'read fan fiction, quick, quick!'. Unbelievable, really.

So, I'm gonna warm up my hands.

barush: (edward (copy of a copy))
So I indeed did go to school today, which, as it turned out, wasn't the best idea. Long story, but the next time I'll be smarter and stay home.

I'd stay home tomorrow 'cause my flu got only worse, but we're having an Open Day at our school on Saturday and we need to 'rehearse' lmao Yes, I'm participating again, but I'm kinda starting to regret it, eh. The idea is 'TV news'. We've shot some videos (which are rather weird) and we'll be commenting them in Czech, Spanish and French. I'm doing the Spanish part and some of Czech maybe as well, dunno. It'll be interesting though, seeing as I can hardly speak. Also, it's supposed to be funny, but nobody knows what's gonna happen exactly, as the rehearsal tomorrow will be our first and last... But it's my last Open Day at this shool, so I wanna enjoy it =))

Also, it's my 'name day' is today and my mother actually got me something, which hasn't happened in... God... years lmao But the funniest part is that at first I didn't even know it was today so I was like 'wtf?' when she gave me the stuff lol

And, OMG, I've finished the book of doom, go me! lol
barush: (15 feet)
I'm seriously contemplating not going to school tomorrow (or today, actually), hm. I'm sick and didn't manage to study all the shit I was supposed to. And that's just not cool. Then again, it's probably better to be examined tomorrow even if the results should be disastrous, than studying the same stuff for next week. Which I might end up doing anyways 'cause the teacher won't have time to examine everyone. Gosh, such a dilemma.

I guess I'll decide in the morning.

And I should probably post some sensible entry too, for once. Oh well.

barush: (loverman)
I thought I could update this thing from time to time.

School sucks lately. We have a shitload of work but I'm too lazy to do anything (dunno, like study for example) so you can imagine the results. You know, most of the people in their last year of high school would be probably studying their asses off, but not me. I just can't bring myself to care. Yesterday I randomly looked up some old entrance exams to the uni's I could possibly apply to and realized they're like a hundred times more difficult than what I expected. So now I'm going through this stage of wallowing in self-pity and misery and thinking I won't get into any uni. Which is a distinct possibility. The fact that I don't even know yet where I want to apply doesn't help at all. The course I wanted before is out of the question now so I've no idea again. Oh well.

Moving on. Last Saturday I was in Prague with my best friend and her friend to see a musical. It was awesome but I'd known it'd be as I'd seen it before. Well, anyways, the day after we got home my best friend told me she had mumps. Which are highly contagious and the symptoms take 3 to 5 weeks to manifest. So you've probably guessed that for the past week I've been having imaginary pains below my ears and expecting my glands to become three times larger than they're now. Dunno, maybe I have it maybe not, guess I'll see in a month or so.

Lately my days have been spent watching House and reading House fics. Still no life. Oh well.

When I have something more interesting to say I'll update again. Or something totally random, knowing myself.
barush: (15 feet)
So I was stupid enough to choose Cuba for my  presentation for Spanish. For Monday. It should be 10-15 minutes long and preferably without any notes or just occasional peeking, no reading. In Spanish. God. I'm happy if I can remember a 2 minute resumé. I'm so fucked. And I know nada about Cuba, no less. Well apart from Fidel and El Che, I guess.

And as if this torture wasn't enough, we're having an exam from political philosophy on Tuesday. It's 30 pages in the textbook plus my notes. And a chemistry test. And a homework to physics. I'd better start doing something I guess.

I'm afraid I'm not gonna survive this last year of high school *sigh*

barush: (15 feet)
I've been just listening to The Scientist by Coldplay and it's literally made me cry. I'm probably turning into a sap as songs never make me cry. Well not anymore it seems. Oh well.

Other than that, I've realized I totally don't get maths. At all. Usually I understand at least smt to get at least 3 from a test (1 is the best, 5 the worst, for the ones who dunno), but not this time around. Nada. Equation of a circle, who the Hell needs that anyway? God, I hate maths.

I'll probably give up on it and try to write. I've been stupid enough to promise another fic so I'd better make it at least readable.

barush: (suicide)

Random whining ensues. You've been warned.  )


barush: (Default)

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